Friday, April 9, 2010

Baby Showers- advice needed.

I just went out to lunch with two friends who had offered months ago to throw me my baby shower. As you recall, I said no. Well, from a few posts down I mentioned that I was beginning to regret this decision. At the lunch, one of my friends ('sue'), the one who had insisted but then had marital problems and left town, brought it up again. I felt weird since the other friend ('jane') was quiet while sue really urged me to do it even if it was post baby. So I said hesitatingly okay maybe but when would it be? She suggested May 1 or 2. That's Week 39. My due date is May 7. My question to you guys is, is that too close to the due date to have a shower? As for inductions it likely wouldn't happen until that week, but aren't there high odds I could go into labor on my own before then?

I said okay and she asked me to get a list to her by tomorrow and she'll start planning it. Sue told me she was planning the shower even out of town with her marital issues and had e-mailed Jane but Jane had told her I didn't want one. Which is true. I didn't. So now I feel like since Sue is going to be relying on Jane to throw the shower too, am I inconveniencing Jane since there are only three weeks to go for the shower? Should I even be doing it at this point?

Any advice much appreciated.


  1. you should totally do it, it's never too late, you deserve to enjoy some things that non-if'ers get to enjoy too!! my shower was the week before i had louise and it was fine, i do wish it would have been a little earlier but i'm glad i had one regardless. i don't think you should worry about inconveniencing anyone, if they are your friends it won't be an inconvenience, it will be fun for them to share in your excitement! do it do it do it!!! and stop second guessing yourself! (have you registered anywhere?)

  2. Why not go for it? It doesn't have to be crazy fancy. And your two friends should be able to figure out who's planning/taking care of what amongst themselves. If you have to cancel/postpone because you're in labour, so be it.

  3. Let Sue worry about inconveniencing Jane. You let Sue do her thing and show up.

    You theoretically could go into labor on your own before then, but you theoretically could go at 40w6d. Don't worry about it.

    Your friends want to do something for you, let them and enjoy the ride and hey if baby comes early it can always be rescheduled and if your water breaks at the shower you'll have a sun story. The odds are much higher in favor of everything working out than not....

  4. i say use your energy to relax into the kindness of your friend. she obviously wants to do this for you...why not practice accepting her love and support?
    as for going into labor...the odds are much more in favor of you going past your guess date than before...and if you're in labor or you already have the baby these things can be cancelled/rescheduled...what would be the harm in that?

  5. I say go for it! You've had an amazing (sometimes scary) journey, and I think eventually you might regret it... and worst case, the party gets canceled because Mr. Sunflower decides to make his appearance early! Which- All your friends that would have been coming wouldn't mind at all!

  6. I think you should absolutely do it! If you get a list to her soon she can get invites out in a few days and 2 weeks (or 3!) is plenty of notice for guests. As for if it's too late in the pregnancy, I say chance it! If you're little guy is already with you then, all the more fun for guests at the shower! If not, you can get all the last minute stuff you need :)

  7. I have to say do it too. At the very least you will get some cute things. If you happen to go into labor they can still have the shower on your behalf - I've known several mommies who have had to miss their own shower but it still went on. I nearly missed mine - I was on bedrest the next day.

    I doubt you would go into labor anyway, most FTM tend to deliver on time or possibly even a little late. If you are unsure of whether or not to have it maybe talk to your dr about it and see what they say...

  8. Do it, do it, do it, do it!!

    You could check with your doctor about the date of inducement to make sure?? That is the nice thing, you can schedule your own labor ;). Is he still going to induce if your cervix isn't ripe? That is one thing my OB metioned. He said he wouldn't induce me if my cervix wasn't ripe.

    Everything will fall into place. You won't regret it. ;) :) :)

  9. I say go for it! Odds are you'll make it to your due date, so timing wise it should be ok. I'm sure if Jane us uncomfortable she'll talk to Sueand they'll hash it out, but that's not for you to worry about. Relax and enjoy the celebration! You've certainly earned it! :)