Tuesday, August 21, 2012

Ultrasound, gender, and name advice


It's official, we have the proof along with some cute profile shots of the little one hanging on our fridge from our 20 week ultrasound that we are definitely 100% having another little boy. I think we were in shock because the tech at our 13 week ultrasound the tech pointed out what she insisted were girl parts. So, we had picked out a girl name, I was researching books on raising girls and then, well, no- boy.

Sunny wrote a while back about the sympathetic looks she gets from people now that she is a mom to four boys and no girls and how this rankled her considering all that she had went through. I havent been getting too much of this though I do get the ocassional well you can always go for a third, but while I am so thankful for my boy[s] because forget having a girl or a boy, I'm just thankful to be a mother and to have a child [soon to be children] but the fact that I might never have a daughter to pass down my jewelry, and to share the mother-daughter connection, does give me a moment to pause. It also fascinates me because I'm from a culture that values boys above all else. One of my aunts had five daughters in pursuit of her sixth son. Until she had that boy it was despair and doom and gloom. It's weird to think that some of my relatives are jealous that I get to have boys like its nothing while I just wanted a healthy and happy baby regardless of what was between their legs. A girl or a boy, they are unique people who have never before inhabited this earth and will bring something new and beautiful. And my relationship with a daughter is undeniably going to be different than with a son, but is it a lesser relationship? I'd like to think not.

A friend of mine is pregnant and due at the same time as me. She really wanted a daughter but is having a son. She is so disappointed. She says she's not but its written all over her face. When I tell her how fun boys are, she just looks at me like a daughter is funner. I have to admit, having mentally gotten ready for a little girl I understand that pang of disappointment. I never did understand it before. Before when someone wanted one sex over another I felt pure revulsion. But now, on some level I get that a person can want a boy and a girl. But when I see my friend's sadness all I can think is you have no fucking clue. When you get pregnant right away, I think some of that perspective is lost. You think you're entitled to a boy or a girl when youre not entitled to shit. I try to be patient because perhaps I too would sulk if I hadn't had to really face the potential of never having children.

But in any case, I'm having a little boy. And come December/January I cannot wait to meet him.

On an totally different topic I need your advice. We are considering a name. Since we are looking at arabic origin name this name is the arabic for Moses: Musa.

My husband loves this name beyond all else but I'm worried kids might tease him with that name? [I was a teacher and I was a kid who was picked on] he pointed out that who would have thought my name would get picked on but it was. That any name can be teased [handy Andy]. What do you think of this name? Honest opinions would be greatly appreciated as in my culture this would be a beautiful name but I am wodnering, does it sound like a little kid's name to you? Does it sound easy to pick on? would it look silly on a resume or on a fully grown man? any perspective much appreciated.